Wanna see something gross???

So after the complete and total disaster I will call "yesterday" my daughter thought she would do some thing totally and completely gross...but yet thought it was the most hysterical thing in the whole world.............let me show you from END to BEGINNING.....





This is how she looked when I caught her...............

But to understand the full effect...you have to see where her finger was just a moment before....

Went for a long drive yesterday...

Up to see Lori and Spike! Kyle had to pick up an engine yesterday from about 2 1/2 hours away. We left after Sanites ball game (she got up there and really tried to hit the ball!...We were able to talk with the coaches a little bit more about some of the physical issues we have with her..I think this team will be great!!!!). We had a little extra time (we left Madison around 11:30 but didn't have to be up there until 3:30) so we drove to get something to eat (drive through) and took our time going up 31 all the way from Madison to Noblesville. It was such a great drive. Sometimes we just forget to stop and look at all the beauty around us that God has created. It was amazing. We arrived in Noblesville, picked up the engine, then went to Don Pablo's (one of my FAV restaurants). It was so nice to see them and their kids (except Brit..she was sick again! WE MISS YOU BRIT!). Their kiddos just crack me up! When we tried to leave I couldn't pry our kids off of theirs. They absolutely LOVE spending time with the girls and talk about them all the time. We also got some great news...The girls will be coming to our house in 2 weeks! I am so excited. This time it will be warmer out and we can do more outside. Lori send LOTS of play clothes! I am thinking park days, zoo days, and just some fun days down by the creek. We ended up getting home somewhere around 10:00 (we had to go pick up my car from my in laws). Kids went to bed and got up for church this am. It was SO GREAT to hear Kyle preach again. For that part of the day it was great, pretty much the rest was just bad, bad, bad..so bad we don't even want to go there. Feeling a bit disconnected lately....I think we are searching for where abouts we belong. ANYWAY...I did get a good bit of my garden planted and well...it looks like the 20X30 garden is not going to be big enough...looks like we are going to have to double it at least. I was able to get 3 different varieties of tomatoes planted, green bells, orange bells, yellow bells, banana peppers, crookneck squash, and egg plant. I still have to get my corn, green beans, cucumbers, spaghetti squash and acorn squash in...and that's all just my 1st round! In 2 more weeks I want to plant more green beans, bell peppers, and corn!!!

WHO DA MAN?!?!?!

NOAH CASWELL IS!! He went tonight and won the Championships for wrestling!! GO NOAH!!!!!! Here is a pic as we were "hyping" him up today...this is his "mean face"....

He was the 7th match to wrestle......Aunt Terri, Uncle Brian, Cortney, Trenton, Angie, Amanda, Chris, and Jake (a high school wrestler he REALLY looks up to) were all there yelling and cheering him on.......and what happened???? The other kid got hurt and while they took him over to get fixed up Noah just stood there on the mat for a minute....

The other kid was finally able to come back onto the mat and the boys fought their little hearts out. Now let me say too, this was the CHAMIONSHIPS...these were the top 2 out of their weight class in the whole county (it is comprised of 8 different wrestling teams). This was a VERY big deal. Sad to say there could only be one winner. One would be 1st place and the other 2nd place. Would you like to guess who was 1st???

So far so good.....

School is going amazingly well this week! We started back on Monday and boy has it been a trip! We are LOVING KONOS and so far this no TV thing has been GREAT for attitudes. The Jars with clothespins are working really well too....the kids are getting really excited about actually getting to have some screen time this week! So far I have been able to do math with both kids at the same time... here is a pic of them doing math on their 1st day back....

Looking great aren't they??? Here is another picture I took while we were doing KONOS in the afternoon. We had just built a walk through "model" of the ear. They made their own ear drum, used a shell for the cochlea, used a hammer and some metal for the bones, blankets for the ear canal, and an extension cord for the auditory nerve!

Then here is one of them just being silly....how did Noah do that?!?! I couldnt climb that for the life of me!

and one last pic of my silly boy...isnt he silly???

Weekend was great..until the ickies crept in

We started off on Thursday by heading to the zoo and boy did we have FUN! The kids were so excited to go and see the tigers. And of course, of all things, their favorite was the goats (seriously?). They were able to walk in a pet them and that was just the cats meow. They were able to see the polar bears, the wallabies, the Emu, the giraffe and the Louisville zoo's newest member... a baby elephant born just a few weeks back! He is so cute! No name yet but they are having a contest for that:)
Friday was run run run, we had to go to walmart and get some last minute school supplies for Monday, get some other running done,and then had dinner with our buds Michele and Ethan. We had so much fun. It had been so long since I had seen her (a couple weeks...and that's a long time for us!). I then called my husband to see what he wanted to eat and I would bring it home for him. He said "Oh by the way...Happy Anniversary..." It wasn't our wedding anniversary....but the anniversary of our 1st date...a blind date at that...so to anyone who says blind dates are bogus....here I am 11 years later married to my best friend in the whole world:)

On Saturday we weren't really sure what our plans were going to be....we ended up doing TONS of yard work and heading to the Library to pick up oodles of books for our reading time and for our attentiveness unit. We ended up having a family night that night with lots of Pizza and a movie :)Unfortunately my throat was starting to hurt and I was coughing insanely.

Today was Church this am, then off to my sissy's for lunch (grilled hamburgers...it was so good!)We played a bit of Yahtzee and then headed home for more work. Kyle tilled up my garden area for me!!! YEAH!!! Right now it is about 20x30 but I am thinking I may make it bigger as I want a MASSIVE garden this year. I cleaned a bit inside and headed back off to evening service. We came home and started getting the kids ready for bed when my son comes up and says "You have a bloody nose mama" of course I thought he was asking a question and I said no I don't...he said "You have a bloody nose mama" to which I replied "No, I don't." He then said "NO MAMA, YOU HAVE A BLOODY NOSE!" At that point I felt it and looked down. My shirt was instantly stained with blood. UG I HATE this time of year!

Angela

Heading into the black hole called school.....

Ahh..........so the past month has been nice.......but as of tomorrow...no more staying up late...up at 5 because there is......SCHOOL!!!!!!!!!!! Don't get me wrong...I am SO looking forward to this year....I will have a 2nd grader and Noah is continuing in Kindergarten. We have so many exciting things to do this year....Sanite and I went to the Library and picked up tons of library books on hearing and sound (our 1st unit study is on attentiveness and this week we are paying close attention to the ear and the importance of listening). We also picked up the movie "The Miracle Worker." This is the new one by Disney, not my favorite thought. My favorite one is the one made back in the 60's with Anne Bancroft as Annie Sullivan and Patty Duke as Hellen Keller. But Alas, our library did not have it! Many changes are "a comin' " for our family next week. We have started to see some attitudes in the kids that we just don't like....seeming a little bit too worldly. So it seems as if we are joining the ranks of all the weirdos....yep you guessed it....we are turning off the TV during the week. Our schedule (tentatively) will look like this...

me up at 5:00am
Kids up at 6:30am
7:30am-breakfast
8:00- tea time/bible time
8:30-11:30- working on school work (reading, writing, math) with both kiddos
11:30-12:00- working outside in the garden (starting next week...we don't plant until Saturday)
12:00-12:30- playtime
12:30-1- lunch
1:00-1:45- Silent reading time
1:45-4:00- unit study activities.
And by this time I have 2 other kids at my house who are wanting me to do homework with them and I need to get started cooking dinner so we can leave by 6 for whatever activity we have that night..... it will go like this..

Mondays- Sanite Dance, sometimes a baseball game in there too, sometimes I have Homeschool meetings
Tuesdays- Noah t Ball practice- sometimes a Baseball game for Sanite
Wednesday- Bible Study
Thursdays- Noah and sanite ball practice, sometimes Games
Fridays- Yeah a night off! Oh whoops...except for when we have adoption group meetings...
Saturdays- Sometimes T ball games, Sometimes Baseball Games, Sometimes both :)
Sunday- A DAY OF REST!!!! LOL We have service in am and PM and that's it! YEAH!!!

We are also starting a new rewards system for the kids and its called Caswell Clips. They each have their own ball canning jar with their color on it (this came about during school a couple years back..the kids keep all their own school supplies in their own back pack. It would drive me nuts when they would leave pencils, scissors etc on the table and I wouldn't know who the culprit is!). Whenever they complete a subject in school without complaining/crying/whining (doesn't happen to often), or when they complete chores without complaining they will get a clothespin (clip) to put in their jar. When their jar is full they can earn an hour of screen time (computer, TV etc). When they break a family rule they loose a clip. If they don't have any clips to loose then they owe me a chore.....HOPEFULLY this will help cut down on discipline! It had been driving me nuts lately! Of course I know the biggest part of this is that they are greatly missing a routine!

What to do......

Sanite has been home 4 years now. She came home at the age of 3 and is now 7 1/2. She loves to play sports. In fact now she is in instructional baseball (coach pitch). The problem is her gross motor skills are still so far behind. She runs like she is hunched over, she can't pick up her feet very well, and throwing a ball is very difficult for her( picture a normal 1st grader throwing a ball...then envision my daughter who throws the ball and it might go 5ft off the ground and 10 ft forward if she is lucky). She constantly acts "stiff" where other kids her age are more flexible. Emotionally and attachment wise things have been great with her but we still have to "pull out" information. Her baseball practice went horrible last night (her 1st one). It was VERY obvious to everyone (I even heard a few laughs) that she was not even near the same level as everyone else. At times she seemed frustrated and at times she seemed happy. At 7 years old she is bound to pick up on all this, but she has yet to say anything. I would LOVE to pull her out because I don't want anyone laughing at my girl, but yet she wants to go back. In fact even one of the couches seemed to be getting frustrated with her because she didn't get the concept of running past 1st base (last year in T-ball they had to stop directly at 1st base). I hate to ask her detailed questions because I am afraid I am going to put ideas in her head that really weren't there to begin with.

She is a VERY intelligent little girl...we homeschool and for the most part she is above her grade level...but I am afraid of how she is going to be treated or how people are going to act towards her because she is not up to par with her peers. Any advice???

Teenage mutant ninja whatevers.....

Yesterday was so much fun! We went to church in the am and had a great time. After we left we came right home. Kyle and Sanite got ready for their day and Noah, Maddie, and Myself got ready for our day. Kyle and Sanite left and went down to Clarksville to eat at Logan's Roadhouse. After that they went to the mall and sanite got this cute little gift bag from the Bath and Body works that has American Girl Co on it. So cute! I would of loved to have been a fly on the wall seeing Kyle walk around in there smelling all the different scents with her LOL.

On the other hand....Noah, Maddie and myself went to Captain D's for lunch (I really tried to get him to go somewhere else ug). What I had was actually pretty good..it was the carb counters fish. I think I like it better than the fried fish! The steamed veggies were pretty good but I didn't much care for the green beans. After that we went to the movie theater downtown in historic Madison to see Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Noah LOVED it! He was so excited when he left there all he could talk about was "fighting turtles." Maddie fell asleep right at the end lol poor kid had to go to sleep just in time to get up :(

Then for some reason.....Sanite was sick ALL night. I don't know if it was something that she ate or what...but she was begging to go to the Dr. The problem is......she is a great actress:) No Doubt, there was something wrong with her....but how bad was it really...she was holding her belly and rolling on the floor flopping like a fish out of water..moaning/screaming the whole time. We put her in our bed and left her. When I wasn't in there she was wailing...still holding her belly and maybe moaned a bit but when she would see us it would suddenly get MUCH worse. So I told her I was going to give her some meds to help her...OK it was really more to help me as it was Benedryl. I told Kyle to leave her in our bed for 1 hour (it was now 1am) and if she was still moaning/crying after being in there an hour by herself while under the influence of meds I would take her to the emergency room. Well lo and behold she moaned for about 15 minutes and went to sleep. She did wake up at one point in the night to use the restroom again and she said her belly hurt but she went back to bed and didn't wake up again until around 9:30am. Right now she is vacuuming her room :) I would say she is feeling MUCH better!

Had a great day :)

Today was a great day! Started off by actually waking up to my husband (very hard to do as he has been working SO MUCH the past few weeks!) There was a cleaning day at the church today, but being as I had 3 kids and spending the day trying to keep the kids out of every ones hair was just not my idea of fun! Kyle did go and work for a bit, but I had taken my job and completed it last night (cleaning out my class room) that way I could still do work but not go today. After all the kids woke up they came and snuggled with me in the bed for a while (I LOVE THAT!!) while they watched cartoons. We finally got out of bed around 10, made some oatmeal for breakfast, and started on some of our chores.

I had started on Maddie's hair yesterday, but didn't finish until today. She has TONS of little twists on her head. I trimmed up her ends and I can already see where they are starting to hold a little bit better. I will have to post a picture of my sunshine tomorrow :)

The kids ate some mac and cheese for lunch (a VERY longed-for lunch as they almost never get it!) and took a nap. While the kids were napping I brought in my husband to "touch up" the highlights in my hair...big mistake.....needless to say...I have to call and make an appt to have them toned down as I look like a Madonna wanna-be.....waaaaaaaaaaaaay too much blond! I can't see any brown in my hair AT ALL! ARG

So after the hair fiasco I decided that I could make myself known in public today, even though I felt like Bozo the clown. We went to wal-mart to get some food items for this week (we had ham tonight so I decided to make ham and bean soup on Monday..YUM YUM!). I also had to pick up some gifts for a baby shower tomorrow. I am not going, thought about it and just decided that I am not ready, and well, I am allowing myself to be a bit selfish on this one. Besides, everyone will take one look at the ray of sunshine sitting on top of my head and either go blind or pull out their sun glasses. Yes Y'all, its that bad.

So tomorrow is another day to meet with brothers and sisters and gather together in Worship. I LOVE Sundays! Well, I love anytime I can get together with the brethren. Hopefully they wont see me coming through the door, see the reflection off of my head, and think it is the Glory of God cause Jesus is coming back....they will be sorely disappointed...only Angela with a bad dye-job...

Oh and yep another good thing about tomorrow....I get a mother-son date:) I think we are headed to Captain D's for lunch (his favorite) and then to see Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Not my fav but I love spending time with him! Sanite gets to go on a Daddy/Daughter date and she is so excited....she has picked to go out to lunch at Logan's Roadhouse and then walk around the mall lol. She also asked to get some stuff at Bath and Body works...OK when did this kid grow up and become ME?!?!

A Poem I found today......

Heaven Nursery

Author: Unknown

In Heaven there must surely be

A special place,a nursery

Where 'little spirits' not fully grown

Go to live in their Heavenly home.

The angels must attend with love

Tiny spirits on wings of doves,

The choir of angels must sing lullabies

Maybe quiet their tiny cries.

The Father must come by each day

To cuddle and play in a special way

These tiny spirits left earth too soon

Little ones called Home from the womb.

These sparks of life did not perish

But came to the Father's love to cherish,

To grow and be taught in his own arms

Safely away from all earthly harm.

The comforter was sent to earth at once

To the parents who lost their little one

Their hearts so ache,their arms feel empty

The question 'why' seems so tempting.

Then all at once in the midst of tears

There comes a peace that stills the fears

The parents share the Father's own need

To hold their tiny spirit being.

They relinquish their own desperate hold

And release their baby to the Father's fold,

Then comes an angel to whisper the truth

Of a nursery in Heaven bearing rich fruit.

Of tiny spirits chosen to worship the Father

A place that couldn't be filled by another,

Called to be spared from the struggles of earth,

Chosen to be one of Heaven's births.

So Father,whisper words of love from me

To our unborn 'life' in your nursery

Dance with Jesus Lucas! Mama, Papa, Sissy, Bubba, and Sunshine love you and can't wait to see you!

SO glad this is a new week

So last week I ended up loosing the baby on Friday. It was the WORST miscarriage I have ever had. It was very painful both emotionally and physically. I am so glad its over and we can now move on. I went to the Dr on Wednesday and everything is all clear so it seems it was a pretty clean miscarriage and there is no need for a d&c. The good news is, he thinks that it could just be my progesterone levels and there is a way to fix it:) Of course this is going to involve calculations, medications/injections, which is so NOT the way I want to go but on the other hand, I can't deal with another loss like that.

Only 54 more sleeeps until we leave for vacation!!! WHOO HOO! We can't wait! As time goes on the kids get more and more excited to see Mickey and Donald.

And......9 more sleeps until we start back to school. I think the kids are already starting to get bored as they are asking when we are going to start back. Of course I am a nerd and they tend to follow in my footsteps....we bought our new curriculum and of course the sight of new school books makes me drool and it excites them to no end to get to use them lol. What can I say... lol

This has been a very difficult week for us. We found out last Thursday that we were indeed expecting a baby:) I called the Dr office, and was able to get into the lab on Friday for my HCG. We try to enter this carefully as I have had 7 losses already. MY hcg on Friday was a whopping 270! Such great news. I have never even made it this far! We go through our weekend just terribly excited, telling friends and family for desperate prayer. Then to go back yesterday, and see my hcg level fall nearly 50% was heart breaking. It would of been easier if someone would of ripped my heart out. I try not to have my doubts, but sometimes you just wonder. I almost wonder why I am allowed to go through this. Am I being taught a lesson? What is it that I need to learn? What am I supposed to gleam for the loss of 8 children? Maybe its compassion, compassion for others. I am truly so blessed to have the 3 most wonderful children in the world, maybe this is to help me reach out to others in this situation and give them hope of a family through adoption. Though that doesn't feel right to me at times either as it almost makes it sound as if adoption is "2nd best" where I know its not. My children are the best and God knew that their spirit belonged in our family whether it be by adoption or birth. More prayer, more prayer, more prayer. I wish that there was some type of way to know for sure....Of course now...In my timing and maybe not in Gods. Either way I would be ok...If I knew I would never have bio children that would be fine with me, but in the meantime I feel like that proverbial donkey with the carrot in front of him...Constantly striving for a goal that you can see, hear, smell, but can never ever touch and achieve.